Hottest lunch on record!

The hottest lunch in April Berkeley history was recorded today, with lunch temperatures soaring to 89 degrees Farenheit (32 degrees Celcius). The new record has resulted in exploding garden salad cherry tomatoes and spontaneous ignition of potato bread sandwiches, whilst prompting renewed calls for a cap on human sweating - believed to be the cause of increased lunch temperatures.

Commenting on todays record high, Nobel Laurete Al Gore, director of the pressure group Sandwich Crisis and producer of the documentary 'The Inconvienience of Sweating', has renewed calls for a cap on human sweating.

"Today we see more evidence of the effect of human sweating on the temperature of our lunches," Al Gore says. "It may be inconvienient, but the truth is, the correlation between human sweating and the temperature of our lunches is direct proof of our changing lunch environment as a result of sweating. I implore the international community to act now, and cap human sweating by administering Oxybutynin to our most profuse sweaters."

To further make his point, Al Gore has released images, of crying children burnt by their hot food and evidence of the link between sweating and increased lunch temperatures:

Whilst the view of Al Gore is that of scientific consensus, critics and readers of the Michael Crichton book 'Fear of Hot Lunches' remain adamant that human sweating has nothing to do with the temperature of our lunches.

"[increased sandwich temperatures as a result of human sweating] is a nonsense," says Sam Peterwhich, a spokesperson for the pressure group Lunch Change Skeptics. "Was it a lack of sweating that plunged us into the icecream-age? No. Lunch temperature is cyclical, and probably controlled by time travelling Jews."

How hot has your lunch got? What do you think is the cause?